Oh my, this week’s topic applies to ALL of us, regardless of relationship status.
My Love Letter to you, is focused intently on the very cornerstone that any search for love OR attempts to nurture loving relationships, rests upon.
Photo by Anna Sullivan on Unsplash
That cornerstone, is our individual level of self-love.
Many of us don’t recognize how our own lack of self love is affecting our relationships and how we present to others. The symptoms bare themselves out, but the root is harder to see. We can address some symptoms in the moment however the coaching work I do with my clients is about sustainable change, not momentary epiphanies, therefore we go deep to the source, so true love can flow.
The most common symptoms people call me with is a lack of confidence and self-worth. And whilst there is work we can do to be more confident, and to build our self-worth… if we don’t focus on self love, most of our efforts will be for nought.
Why?
Self love is the seed, from which a forest of self-worth and confidence can grow.
Photo by Trent Haaland on Unsplash
We must sow the seeds deep, and in great abundance!
This week I am running a SELF LOVE CHALLENGE in my fb community and I wanted to share it with you, too. The following is a step by step process to spend your next 7 days, taking action to curating a practice of self love.
Are you ready to take the challenge towards more self love?
7 DAY SELF LOVE CHALLENGE
Challenge Step 1:
>> Make a list of at least 10 items you know are acts of self-love for you, and you alone.
Ten actions, that are not just self care of your basic needs but strongly affectionate acts that bring you joy, calm, happiness, wellbeing, pleasure physically, emotionally and spiritually. Ten acts that are real treats, genuine special splurge like ideas, that maybe you just don't allow yourself often enough, that bring you childlike wonder and joy, and are just for your own absolute pleasure!
*this could be... making a beautiful dinner that you eat by candlelight with some of your fav music, yoga, reading a good book for pleasure, long walk in the countryside, chocolate, spa day, facials, fav pod cast, coaching, time with nephews and nieces, spin class, meditation, jumping in the sea, fancy meal out, antiquing, live music, being creative with art or hobbies, positive affirmations, a course that will fulfill your soul, lunch in the sunshine, open mic nights, and on and on and on!
Challenge Step 2:
It’s time to get really REAL with ourselves and assess just how active we have been in our self love.
>> Take some time here and line by line, item by item, make a numerical notation next to each item that correspond with how many times you actually participated and partook in each of these estimable acts of self love on your list, in the last 30days.
Photo by The Journal Garden | Vera Bitterer on Unsplash
Challenge Step 3:
>> Take out your calendar/diary and schedule in SOMETHING every day!
It doesn’t have to be an hour yoga class… maybe 15 minutes on a Yoga app before bed? It may not be 30 minutes of mediation at 7am, but instead a sleep mediation you find on youtube you use at bedtime. It may not be a grand dinner with friends, but scheduling in a 10 minute phone call to your bestie for a giggle.
Do not let your perception of time, stop you from loving you. Find ANY time you can, every day to LOVE YOU!
Intentionally CARVE out 5 minutes on one day, 20 minutes on another, 1-2 hours on a Sunday.. whatever it takes to implement even the smallest act of self love, EACH DAY. It’s high time, you make YOU the first stop on the LOVE tour.
Maybe you don’t have a top 10!?! Maybe you have never EVER considered yourself, your needs, your desires, your care as a priority? Maybe you’re not even sure what makes you happy?
WELCOME dearest one. You're in the right place!
I challenge you to come up with a list, let your fingers to the walking on google “What is self love?”, carve out those same blocks in your dairy with the notation ‘Find my joy!’ and “Self Love’. Go out and experiment till you find your personal Top 10 list!
Find your happy places, and visit them daily!
Photo by Artem Bali on Unsplash
Challenge Phase 4:
Accountability in a challenge can boost your results tenfold...
>> Grab a friend and do the challenge with them!
>> Comment here with your lists!
>> Are you a single lady out in the wilds of the modern dating jungle? Then, dearest one, come join is over at the quite discreet and incredibly supportive, Feminist Seeks Love fb community, where we are doing it together! Join us, HERE